Ayatollah Agrees To Surrender But Only If JD Vance Wears This Cute Sailor Outfit
BabylonBee.com ISLAMABAD — In a stunning breakthrough in the ongoing peace negotiations, Ayatollah Mojtaba Khamenei agreed to a full surrender...
FUN
Crippled Man Lowered Into Oval Office In Search Of Trump’s Healing
BabylonBee.com .🐝 WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a scene reminiscent of ancient Capernaum, a crippled man was lowered through a hole...
SCOTUS Rules Death Penalty Is OK For People Who Post ‘BREAKING’ And A Siren Emoji Before Every Tweet
BabylonBee.com U.S. — In a landmark decision sure to send shockwaves across the social media influencing sphere, the Supreme Court...
‘HI, BARACK!’ Yells Biden As Car Passes House With A Lawn Jockey
BabylonBee.com WILMINGTON, DE — Secret Service agents reportedly looked at each other and shook their heads on Wednesday, as former...
With Swalwell Resigning, Just 534 Perverts Left In Congress
BabylonBee.com WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the sudden resignation of California Representative Eric Swalwell over sexual assault charges, analysts speculated that...
Trump Predicts His Approval Ratings Will Be Resurrected In Three Days
BabylonBee.com WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump told reporters on Monday that he wasn't concerned about his recent dip in popularity...
San Francisco Unveils New City Connect Jersey
BabylonBee.com SAN FRANCISCO, CA — The San Francisco Giants unveiled their new City Connect jerseys today with a nod to...
Psych! Trump Drops Bombs That Just Shoot Out Little Flags That Say ‘POW!’
BabylonBee.com TEHRAN — A cackling President Donald Trump completely psyched out the Iranian regime by threatening nuclear war and then...
Trump Introduces New Birth-Wrong Citizenship Rule To Deport All Losers And Haters
BabylonBee.com WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump has for a long time criticized the concept of birthright citizenship — the...
So long Daniel Craig… The identity of the new James Bond has been revealed
After years of incessant rumours, the news has finally dropped... We now know the identity of the actor playing the...
