Checkmate: Trump Announces He Has His Own Doomsday Clock And It’s Infinity Seconds To Midnight
BabylonBee.com WASHINGTON, D.C. — Following the Bulletin of Atomic Scientists revealing that they had officially moved the Doomsday Clock to...
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Bruce Springsteen Threatens To Keep Releasing Songs Until Deportations Stop
BabylonBee.com COLTS NECK, NJ — After putting out a new song titled "Streets of Minneapolis" as a show of support...
Liberal Women Frantically Refreshing Instagram To See What They Should Be Mad About Next
BabylonBee.com U.S. — Liberal women across the U.S. spent the day feverishly refreshing their Instagram feed to see what they...
Tim Walz Says He Will Do Anything To Keep Minnesota Residents Safe Except Cooperate With Federal Law Enforcement
BabylonBee.com . SAINT PAUL, MN — With tensions between ICE agents and leftist protesters in Minneapolis running high, Governor...
Minnesotans Begin Fleeing To Somalia To Escape Violence
BabylonBee.com MOGADISHU — Minnesotans have begun fleeing in droves to Somalia to escape the escalating threat of violence. As the...
First Astronauts On Mars Greeted By Mormon Missionaries
BabylonBee.com MARS — In what scientists called the most significant discovery in the history of space exploration, the first...
Trump Tells E.U. It’s Time We Start Seeing Other Continents
BabylonBee.com DAVOS — Speaking in Davos at the World Economic Forum, President Donald Trump broke it to European Union...
Trump To Convert Entire City Of Minneapolis Into Insane Asylum
BabylonBee.com WASHINGTON, D.C. — As part of the executive order to bring back mental institutions, President Trump announced this...
Trump Disguises Himself As Muslim Migrant So Europe Will Let Him Invade Greenland
BabylonBee.com WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a brilliant stroke of genius, President Donald Trump has just disguised himself as a...
Denmark Protects Greenland By Securing It In Giant Cookie Tin
BabylonBee.com NUUK — With rhetoric from both European countries and the United States over control of the island escalating, Denmark...
