She Thinks They’re Watching: Is My Friend Losing Touch with Reality?
DEAR ABBY:
How do you tell a dear friend that she may need a mental health evaluation — without hurting her or pushing her away?
My best friend of 20 years has always been someone I could count on, and we’ve weathered so much together. She’s been married for a couple of years now to a man who seems kind and decent. But lately, I’ve grown increasingly concerned about her state of mind.
She’s become convinced that she’s being followed, though she can’t say by whom or why. She accuses her husband of orchestrating public situations just to upset her — like intentionally sitting where he might see other women. The heartbreaking part is, he’s blind in one eye and has very limited vision in the other. She also insists that his ex-wife is flirting with him and believes he may be cheating with her — despite the fact that they’ve been divorced for 20 years.
She now resents any time he spends with his family or grandchildren because she believes it’s connected to this supposed affair. It’s painful to see her spiral like this, especially knowing that her mother was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s at a similar age.
I’ve gently suggested she talk to a therapist or even a pastor, but she either brushes it off or avoids the conversation altogether. She’s even begun to suspect the church is involved in some way. I’m afraid that if I go to her husband with my concerns, she’ll see it as a betrayal — and I might lose her trust completely.
I’m at a loss for what to do. I want to help her before things get worse, but I don’t know how. Please, Abby — what’s the right step?
— HEARTBROKEN IN ARIZONA
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