Prince Harry and Meghan Reportedly Discover They’re Not the Only People Waiting for a Table

In what may have been the most shocking development of their post-royal lives, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle reportedly walked into a popular Montecito restaurant and were informed of a stunning, almost unimaginable reality: there was a wait for a table.

According to a waitress who later recounted the incident, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex arrived expecting immediate seating, only to be told they would have to join the same waiting list as everyone else. The horror.

“Everyone is treated the same here,” the employee reportedly said, adding that the couple appeared annoyed by the prospect of waiting their turn. Rather than endure such an ordeal, they allegedly left the restaurant and never returned.

The story doesn’t end there. According to the waitress, the couple later ordered takeout and sent a staff member to pick it up. Apparently waiting for food was acceptable, but waiting for a table crossed a line.

The anecdote has resurfaced amid renewed discussion about the couple’s standing in the wealthy California enclave they call home. Several local residents quoted in various reports described Harry and Meghan as distant from the community and unusually security-conscious compared with other celebrity neighbors.

One local worker claimed the Sussexes were the only celebrities around town routinely accompanied by bodyguards, while other high-profile residents went about their lives with considerably less fanfare.

Another resident said the couple are largely ignored by locals, who seem more interested in their own lives than spotting former royals in the wild.

Perhaps the most revealing story involved a neighbor who reportedly welcomed the couple to the community with a bottle of local wine and a handwritten note. According to another resident, the unopened gift was returned the next morning by security personnel.

If true, it was a spectacularly efficient way to communicate: “Welcome to the neighborhood. Please maintain a safe distance from the neighborhood.”

Of course, these are anecdotes from people claiming to have encountered Harry and Meghan, and the couple has not publicly responded to the various stories.

Still, if the restaurant account is accurate, it suggests the Sussexes may have learned a difficult lesson familiar to millions of ordinary Americans: sometimes the hostess says it’ll be 20 minutes, and even a prince has to deal with it.

Or at least everyone except the people who think being sixth in line is a constitutional crisis.