Gavin Newsom condemns world leaders at Davos and tells them they should have worn knee pads

In what may be the dumbest attempt at political theater since someone brought a kazoo to a Senate hearing, California Governor Gavin Newsom spent his time at the World Economic Forum in Davos not discussing climate, war, inflation, or anything remotely important — but proudly waving around a pair of red knee pads.

Yes. Knee pads.

Newsom announced that the kneepads — allegedly meant to symbolize leaders “selling out” to Donald Trump — were now available for purchase on a website he personally created, because apparently governing the fifth-largest economy in the world leaves plenty of free time for novelty merch.

“The last round sold out,” Newsom said solemnly, as though this were an achievement worth mentioning to world leaders, adding that law firms, universities, and corporate executives are “selling out” to Trump. He then helpfully informed the audience that the kneepads are available in bulk, in case anyone needed to outfit an entire dignity-free workforce.

The kneepads feature Trump’s signature, because subtlety died years ago.

Earlier in the week, Newsom had already complained that global leaders were “rolling over” for Trump, lamenting that he “should have brought a bunch of knee pads” for them — an observation so clever it apparently required repetition at an international economic summit.

Meanwhile, Newsom revealed that a planned speaking appearance at something called “USA House” was mysteriously canceled after Trump spoke, which he interpreted as evidence of shadowy forces silencing him. USA House, it should be noted, is not actually affiliated with the U.S. government, but rather sponsored by Microsoft, Pfizer, and a blockchain company — which makes it the least patriotic-sounding conspiracy imaginable.

Undeterred, Newsom explained that the cancellation was clearly intentional, personal, and probably very dramatic, though no evidence was presented beyond vibes.

For context, this entire performance took place in Davos, where world leaders typically debate global finance, war, and climate change — but this year were treated to a grown man hawking protest kneepads like a political Etsy vendor.

Newsom, who may or may not want to be president in 2028, has a long history of sparring with Trump. This time, however, instead of policy, legislation, or leadership, he chose novelty sports equipment.

History will surely remember this moment.

Or, more likely, everyone will forget it by lunchtime.

–

ORIGINAL SOURCE