My Mom Is the Perfect Grandmother. But I Can’t Ignore Her Fatal Flaw Any Longer.

by Allison Price

I absolutely love my mother. She is a saint, raised two kids as a single mother, and deserves all the deference therein. She also helps me endlessly with my four children and is an amazing, patient, and attentive grandmother. There’s just that ONE thing…

She’s flag-flying MAGA. She’s deeply religious, though that in and of itself of course isn’t bad, but as happens in today’s politics, she’s also slipping down the conspiracy rabbit holes. Think anti-vax, Armageddon, deep-state corruption. All of it. She has a sister and husband that also believe these things and reinforce her beliefs.

I consider myself independent, admittedly maybe left-leaning, but I avoid political discourse. I live in a red dot of a blue state and I’ve learned to keep my mouth shut. I argued with her in 2020 over voter fraud, but I’ve read trying to push back only makes them dig their heels in deeper and the relationship means too much to me to let this cause a rift. Most of the time, it doesn’t come up. She might make a comment here or there, but I literally just ignore it. Now that Trump is coming back, I’m finding myself bristling more from her comments. They are becoming more frequent and she’s started sending me videos/“evidence” from X (I’m not on X) and I’m suddenly filled with rage. I don’t know where she got the idea that I share her views—or maybe she thinks she can convert me—but I can no longer stand it. I’m afraid I’m going to snap at her and I do not want to do that. She doesn’t deserve it; she means well, she’s just wrong.

I’m also afraid what this might teach my children, if it’ll just confuse them or make them sad like it does me. How can I respond to her in a way that is still respectful, but firmly conveys that I’m not interested? Or should I just continue to smile and nod for the sake of relationship?

—Didn’t Drink the Kool-Aid

https://slate.com/advice/2024/12/perfect-grandmother-fatal-flaw-family-advice.html