I love my boyfriend’s family, except his rapist brother
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DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, “Will,” and I have been together for seven years. We get along great. I love his close-knit family and adore his parents. He’s the youngest of five brothers, most of whom I get along with great. The only brother I don’t know is the oldest. “Rick” has been incarcerated for the better part of 30 years for rape. I’ve always known about him and the “sugar- coated” circumstances surrounding his incarceration.
Recently, Rick has been letting the family know that he has been rehabilitated and will be released with extensive supervision. He told my boyfriend he would like to meet me and also connect with the nieces and nephews he’s never met (not my children). Upon hearing this, I did some research, and I found the non-sugar-coated details of his crimes. Will has made clear to me he will support his brother’s release and is excited to see him. This is the same feeling most of the other family has.
Abby, the thought of being in Rick’s presence terrifies me. I don’t believe a person who commits a crime of this magnitude can be rehabilitated. (A few others feel the same as I do.) I’m worried about the backlash I may receive from family members, as well as his parents, who wholeheartedly believe Rick’s release is warranted. Help, please.
— APPREHENSIVE IN MINNESOTA
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