Man Allegedly Abuses Doctor’s Tesla After Surgery Canceled

THE VILLAGES, Fla. — A Florida retiree allegedly decided that if he couldn’t get surgery, at least somebody’s windshield was going to get some work done.

Police say 78-year-old Glen Lee Ong became enraged after his surgeon canceled a scheduled procedure because Ong had apparently committed one of medicine’s greatest pre-op sins: drinking water after being instructed not to.

Rather than accepting that anesthesia and aspiration risks are generally considered important by people who enjoy not accidentally killing their patients, authorities say Ong developed an alternative treatment plan involving a hammer and the doctor’s Tesla.

According to investigators, employees at a medical building heard two loud bangs and later discovered the surgeon’s vehicle sporting a pair of fresh windshield dents worth approximately $1,600 in damage.

Tesla’s onboard cameras reportedly captured a man wearing a surgical mask approaching the vehicle with a hammer before delivering what mechanics technically refer to as “not recommended maintenance.”

Police later identified the suspect as Ong, whom the doctor reportedly described as a “difficult patient,” a phrase that may now rank among the biggest understatements in Florida history.

Investigators say Ong initially denied being the masked man in the video. That strategy apparently lasted about as long as the Tesla’s warranty would cover deliberate hammer strikes.

According to court documents, Ong eventually admitted damaging the vehicle and allegedly explained his reasoning.

“That guy screwed me over twice,” he reportedly told police. “I was already dressed up to do the surgery, and he called it off just because I had a sip of water.”

Yes, just a sip. Unfortunately, anesthesiologists tend to be annoyingly obsessed with things like keeping stomach contents out of patients’ lungs during surgery.

Authorities say Ong was so committed to his alleged revenge mission that he removed his own license plate beforehand in an attempt to avoid identification. Investigators were then able to identify him anyway, thanks in part to the camera system mounted on the very car he chose to attack.

In what can only be described as a strong endorsement for Tesla’s security features, the vehicle apparently filmed the entire incident.

Ong was arrested Oct. 9 and later released on bond. He is scheduled to appear in court Nov. 3.

Meanwhile, medical professionals across America are reportedly adding “please don’t hit my car with a hammer if your surgery gets canceled” to an already exhausting list of patient instructions.