There’s Something About Our Weekly Lunches That Bothers Me

Dear Abby,

I work in an office with a group of women, and every Friday we have a sort of “potluck lunch social,” where everyone brings in different dishes to share. It’s usually a fun way to end the week, and I really enjoy the variety of foods and the friendly chatter.

However, there is one coworker whose contributions make me uncomfortable. She doesn’t seem very clean. Sometimes I notice a faint odor of cat urine on her coat or purse, and her overall appearance isn’t well kept. Because of this, I’ve always avoided eating anything she brings in, worried about how sanitary her cooking might be.

So far, I’ve managed to steer clear without drawing attention, but lately, she’s been asking me questions about my favorite foods and even saying she’d like to make them for me to enjoy at the lunches. I don’t want to hurt her feelings, but I also don’t feel comfortable eating her food. I’m at a loss for how to handle this situation gracefully without causing tension at our weekly lunches.

Sincerely,
Careful at the Potluck
New York