I’ve asked my mother to take my name off her mortgage, but she refuses
DEAR ABBY: A few years ago, my mother asked me to co-sign the mortgage and be on the title for her house because she couldn’t qualify for the loan on her own. Wanting to help, I agreed and used my income and credit to make it possible for her to buy the home.
Since then, I’ve gotten married, and my husband and I would like to refinance our own home. Unfortunately, my name is still on my mother’s mortgage, which is preventing us from moving forward. I’ve asked her more than once if she would refinance or find another way to remove me from the loan, but each time she says she can’t because she still needs me on it.
The last time I brought it up, the conversation turned into a major argument. She accused my husband of manipulating or controlling me and now says she hates him. She refuses to see him or his family and has been distant and hurtful toward me. It’s heartbreaking to see our relationship deteriorate like this.
I only wanted to help my mother when she needed it, but now I feel trapped in a situation that’s affecting my own marriage and financial future. I don’t know how to move forward without causing more damage to our relationship. What would you advise?
— FEELING STUCK IN MARYLAND
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