Spouse insists on controlling who I talk to in our shared friend group
Dear Abby:
My husband and I have been married for 40 years, and over the years we’ve shared the same circle of friends — joint friends, his friends, and mine. We’ve camped, hosted parties, and traveled together with them.
My problem is that my husband insists I cannot speak privately with the men in our group unless I first tell him what I’m going to say. He also interrogates me about my visits with the wives, mainly to find out whether their husbands were present.
In all our years of marriage, I have never given him any reason to doubt my fidelity. I have always respected him, considered him honest and trustworthy, and loved him wholeheartedly. So why does he feel entitled to control who I talk to or visit without his permission?
This has been an ongoing issue, and I’m exhausted from it — to the point that I sometimes think I might be better off leaving and enjoying what’s left of my life in peace, surrounded by friends and relationships that are free of suspicion and control. Please help.
— PUT IN A CORNER, OREGON
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