Dear Amy: My partner and her two sisters have hijacked Thanksgiving ever since their mother died 10 years ago.
Every year the expectation is that the sisters, their partners and their (now adult) children gather together on Thanksgiving.
When their Mom was still alive, everyone gathered at her home, but every year since has been a battle that reliably stirs up drama — i.e., where to meet (often a different location across the U.S.) or how to find a house that fits all 11 people (because God forbid we split up under different roofs).
But the real issue is that the only people that make these decisions are the three sisters in their private meetings. Significant others have no input at all.
And now that the (privileged and spoiled) children are adults, they are given preference for deciding where we travel, which is often inconvenient for my partner and me, since we live on the other side of the country from the rest.
Again — the three spouses/partners have no say.
When I bring this up to my partner (middle sister) every year, she dismisses it and says the other partners don’t care so why do I?
But I suspect they do care.
Speaking for myself, I have not enjoyed myself at all in 10 years. The family dynamics are painful.