My new boyfriend is still in love with his dead wife

My new boyfriend is still in love with his dead wife

Posted For: Willie Wonka

By Dear Abby

DEAR ABBY: I am a 42-year-old single mom who recently began a relationship with a wonderful man. I have two kids from my marriage to an ex who wasn’t very kind. We did our best for 16 years (we were young when we met) and finally had to go our separate ways. The man I’m dating is sensitive and kind. He’s great to my kids. He’s the first person I’ve dated that I have allowed to meet them.

His first wife passed away three months after their wedding 14 years ago. She had been expecting their first child, and it was a tragedy for all involved. When he speaks about her, I just listen. He did move on after she passed. He remarried and had another child, but it didn’t work out. He claims he never loved his second wife. He got her pregnant early on, and married her because it was “the right thing to do.”

He still carries a torch for his first wife, whom he calls the love of his life. He keeps a picture of her hanging from his rearview mirror and plans to be buried next to her when he passes. While I understand that love doesn’t die when people pass, I can’t help feeling crushed when he says, “If she were still alive, we wouldn’t even be talking right now.” He puts her memory on a pedestal. How do I handle this? I’m not sure I can stay in a relationship like this.



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