My siblings didn’t tell me our mother died. Should I forgive them?

By JEANNE PHILLIPS |

DEAR ABBY: Twenty years ago, I had a falling-out with my siblings and my mother.

I was in an emotionally and physically abusive marriage. They wanted me to leave, but after seven years of his brainwashing, I was convinced that I was worthless, that no one cared about me but him and that I would end up on the street alone and unable to live without him.

My siblings invited me out to visit them and proceeded to browbeat me into leaving him. After three nights of six-hour sessions of being berated and hearing I was a terrible mother for staying with him, it was almost a relief to go home to my husband. At least there I expected it.

Long story short, I haven’t spoken to my family in 20 years. I escaped that marriage five years ago, and my mother and I slowly began rebuilding a relationship over Facebook. I’m in Michigan, and she was in New York. Three months ago, she passed away.

One of my siblings unfriended me and my daughter from my mother’s Facebook before they posted that she passed away. I heard the news from one of my friends who was also FB friends with my mother.

Someone I know is saying I should reach out to my siblings and try to rebuild a relationship. What are your thoughts?

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