Taco Bell: Come for the Diarrhea, Stay for the Drag Show

Taco Bell: Come for the Diarrhea, Stay for the Drag Show

Taco Bell is hoping that attention-deprived, lip-synching chicks with d***s will help you get that breakfast burrito down.

The Taco Bell Drag Brunch show is hitting the road and delivering taped weiners and gyrating man-hips to a Taco Bell Cantina (they have booze) location near you if you live in Chicago, Nashville, Fort Lauderdale, Las Vegas, and New York City, through the months of May and June.

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Audience members hoping to watch needy men shake their chili cheese burritos will have to be 18 years old to enter. Members of Taco Bell’s reward group, “Fire Tier,” will have the first “crack” (heh-heh) at the chance for tickets.

PUKE-O-RAMA! Esquire Magazine wrote that Taco Bell could “conceivably ruin” fast-food breakfast.

Here are the dates and locations in case you don’t want to see drag queens wiggle their cheesy roll-ups as you force down your culturally appropriated Taco Supreme:

  • May 1: Las Vegas Cantina:
  • May 22: Chicago, Wrigleyville Cantina
  • May 29: Nashville Cantina
  • June 12:  New York, Times Square Cantina
  • June 26: Fort Lauderdale Cantina

FACT-O-RAMA! A Taco Bell employee was fired for urinating into the nachos. At least he knew what kind of food he was selling.

One of the lead dudes dancers is Kay Sedia (get it, quesadilla). He will be keeping it unreal at all the events and local drag queens will join the testicle spectacle at each location.

From the Taco Bell press release:

As a brand that brings people together, the Taco Bell Drag Brunch experience is rooted in celebrating the LGBTQIA+ community and creating safe and welcoming spaces for all. To further its mission to break down barriers to education, the Taco Bell Foundation is supporting the It Gets Better Project with a grant to expand workforce readiness resources for LGBTQIA+ youth around the globe. Each Drag Brunch will have dedicated time spotlighting the It Gets Better Project and provide attendees with information on how they can get involved.

According to the same press release, Gropey Joe Biden, Obama, and Hillary “support” the It Gets Better Project and, purportedly, the not so mucho macho nacho drag show. Enjoy your chalupa.

Is nothing sacred folks? We can’t even enjoy faux tacos and tasteless bean paste, (no, the beans are not real either) without the woke drag queens shaking their quesaritos in our faces.

FACT-O-RAMA! Quesaritos, like drag queens, aren’t real. They are half quesadilla and half burrito, like drag queens!

 

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