Should I give my wife more time with her ‘just friends’ buddy?

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I married as teenagers 40 years ago. Our children are adults, and most people consider us a perfect couple.

My wife has had several affairs over the years, some she has admitted to and others I have stumbled across. For the most part, they have been physical only, with no emotional attachment.

Twenty years ago she had a passionate affair with a younger man. It ended when he broke it off to be with someone else. I didn’t know about it at the time.

A year ago, she found out he’s single again and invited him back into her life. Now, she’s openly seeing him. She’s telling me they are “just friends” and she “needs his company because only he understands her.” I believe if he had a better job and financial outlook, she would leave me in a minute.

I can’t stand the thought of losing the love of my life, but I also can’t keep living with her, knowing I play second fiddle in her heart.


She refuses counseling because she doesn’t see this as a problem. Should I give her more time (a year already) or file for divorce?


Dear Abby: Should I give my wife more time with her ‘just friends’ buddy?

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