Late Mother’s Surprising Lifestyle Comes to Light

by Abigail Van Buren

DEAR ABBY: I was never close to my mother-in-law, “Agnes.” She always came across as very religious and morally upright. She recently died of dementia. It came on so fast that there were things Agnes needed to take care of but was unable to. My husband was executor of her estate, so we had to go through all of her things and have them appraised after she passed.

One afternoon, my husband discovered a small binder tucked in the back of his mother’s lingerie drawer. He looked through it and to say he was “shaken” would be an understatement. He let me read it. Apparently, his parents enjoyed wife-swapping, and Agnes took notes detailing her activities. My husband hasn’t mentioned it since, and has left it to me to deal with. I have no idea what to do with it, but we certainly won’t share it with his deeply religious brother or our son, who thought the world of the only grandmother he’d known.

I hesitate to destroy her property, but I don’t feel it’ll benefit anyone to keep it. There is no one I can discuss this with, and it’s not a subject my husband wants to talk about. Your thoughts, please. — EMBARRASSED IN OREGON

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