By Judith Martin
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a new granddaughter. Everyone is thrilled. However, I found myself editing the birth announcement before forwarding it to my family and friends because it contained links to “contribute” to the baby’s expenses.
I think solicitation of this sort is offensive in many ways, and I can’t believe I missed sharing this value with my daughter.
How and when is the best way to communicate this issue with her?
GENTLE READER: Well, definitely before she has another child.
Miss Manners suggests that you tell her that such soliciting is unseemly, and point out that for the last announcement you had to do some creative editing.
No doubt, your daughter will tell you how old-fashioned you are and that everyone is doing it this way now — after she chastises you for preventing half the family from contributing. It is then that you may suggest that you help her create and send announcements to at least your inner circle.
Perhaps you cannot stop her from doing it the greedy way with her own friends, but you will have shown her the proper way to do it — which is really all a mother can do, even when she does manage to get ahead of the situation.
America is a Great Country in which to live.